The road taken

I haven't written for a while. As usual a lot has been going on, but I give God the glory anyway. It kinda of late and I"m extremely tired, but I just feel the need to express my heart through writing tonight. I um just been thinking about decisions and paths I've come across in my 20 years of experiencing life. Since a young child, I was raised in the church, but I got to know Jesus Christ at about 11 years old. I knew about him all my life, but I never experience him before. From then on, I had this theory that if I served God for the rest of my life good things would happen to me ALL the time. I came to learn that God is not a vending machine. You know when you put 25 cents in the machine? You expect to get something that is worth 25 cents out. Well God doesn't work that way. God doesn't want you to serve him because you want good things to happen to you, but you should serve him because he alone is worthy. The road taken is the road for Christ. Its a narrow road, self has to die, so Christ can truly live through us. A couple years of ago when I was about 18, I experience my rude awakening and it just hit me, "God is not a vending machine". Even though its a simple analogy or revelation, its truth Amen

Looking unto Jesus

Psalm 141:8-10 " But mine eyes are unto thee, O GOD the Lord: in thee is my trust; leave not my soul destitute. Keep me from the snare which they have laid for me, and the grins of the workers of iniquity. Let the wicked fall into their own nets, whilst that I withal escape." For the last two verses, I don't feel like a group of people are on my back, I just feel like the enemy is on my back. Just trying to trip me up so I can fall. That their are traps all around me and some I am not even aware of. Just praying that God would just help me so I would escape. So this is my prayer.

The following devotion by Oswald Chambers sums up how I've been feeling

"It has not yet been revealed what we shall be" —1 John 3:2 Naturally, we are inclined to be so mathematical and calculating that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing. We imagine that we have to reach some end, but that is not the nature of spiritual life. The nature of spiritual life is that we are certain in our uncertainty, consequently we do not make our nests anywhere. Common sense says - "Well, supposing I were in that condition . . ." We cannot suppose ourselves in any condition we have never been in. Certainty is the mark of the common-sense life: gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, we do not know what a day may bring forth. This is generally said with a sigh of sadness, it should be rather an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. Immediately we abandon to God, and do the duty that lies nearest, He packs our life with surprises all the time. When we become advocates of a creed, something dies; we do not believe God, we only believe our belief about Him. Jesus said, "Except ye become as little children." Spiritual life is the life of a child. We are not uncertain of God, but uncertain of what He is going to do next. If we are only certain in our beliefs, we get dignified and severe and have the ban of finality about our views; but when we are rightly related to God, life is full of spontaneous, joyful uncertainty and expectancy. "Believe also in Me," said Jesus, not - "Believe certain things about Me." Leave the whole thing to Him, it is gloriously uncertain how He will come in, but He will come. Remain loyal to Him.

Failing or Missing God

Have you ever failed God? I'm sure all of you could say "Yes" at one point that you did. I don't think anyone would say it gives them great pleasure to fail God. But when you fail God, you see how imperfect and weak you are without God. You see your great NEED for God. That you can't live without him. You know when God convicts your heart about something and you KNOW its God who gave you that conviction? When in your heart, you tell God you will obey him. Sometimes you can't wait till God puts you in a situation so you could "prove" to God that you'll really obey him this time. But God doesn't put us in the situation when we think were ready. Sometimes he'll wait 3-4 months go by until you "forget" about the conviction and you find yourself in that situation. And you missed God... I thank God that we can come to the throne of Grace with boldness and asking God for forgiveness and mercy. Hebrews 4:16. I'ts the most terrible feeling in the world failing God. It shows you how weak you are with God. It feels your soul with agony, cause you know you missed an opportunity to be a testimony of Jesus Christ, but you missed it and the only person to blame is YOU. I am glad God doesn't treat us like our sins deserve. Psalm 103:10. David said, if counted all our iniquities not ONE of us will be able to stand. Psalm 130:3 Thank you lord for your mercy, Forgive your children lord. Forgive us for missing you

For all who are thirsty

Isaiah 44:3-4 For I will pour water upon him that is thirsty, and floods upon the dry ground: I will pour my spirit upon thy seed and my blessing upon thine offspring: And they shall spring up as among the grass, as willows bu the water courses. This is something the lord had me read this morning. Isaiah 64:1 Oh that thou wouldest rend the heavens, that thou wouldest come down, that the mountains might flow down at they presence. As when the melting fire burneth, the fire causeth the waters to boil, to make they name known to thine adversaries, that the nations may tremble at thy presence!

Making Jesus real again

I know its been such a long time since I posted something on this blog. I was in North Carolina for spring break and I just came back from Texas. I had a great time in NC. I had a amazing time in Texas. The word of God was on point for all the services. It was just a confirming a lot of things that God had spoken to our ministry and to my life specifically. God was saying through the pastors that we need to make sure there is NO bitterness, unforgivness or any other sin in our hearts in order to be free. Satan desires to bounds us Christians so we won't reach the lost. How can we speak about God being a deliver or a healer? If us Christian are bound and spiritually or physically sick like any other person. This Gospel has to be real to us. We have to make Jesus real again in our lives. We have to lift him daily in our lives. In psalms it says "The fool hath said in his heart there is no God" This verse is stated twice in Psalms. This verse is not only for sinners, but for Christians as well. With our mouth and mind we may confess Christ, but our actions deny him. When I was in Texas, I was thinking about the city of Philadelphia and the college campuses. How God wants to reach them through his people, but if he can't break us and do a work within us...What makes us so different from those who aren't saved? God must be made real in our lives again.

Establishing our own righteousness

Rom10:3 For they being ignorant of God;s righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God. God has been dealing with me about this lately,how I've become so focus on following the "rules" to make sure I am being holy. This is establishing your own righteousness when you become legalistic and forgetting about the grace of God. When you don't trust God enough to change you inside and out, so you subconsciously have a list of rules that defines holiness... and that isn't of God. We aren't under the law anymore, but under the Grace of God. ( Just because we are under the grace of God doesn't give us a way for us to sin willingly though...You don't want to frustrate the Grace of God) Amen